did i just end that?

i ended what?
a series of words written with a slightly coherent thought?
or lame justifications on finding words useless to say even at least a percent of everything that goes on in my head right now?

someone once told me he'd rather be mad than not exist at all.
i'm not mad, am i?
i haven't compelled myself to think that i'm mad either.



for self-theories:

1. I lack the abity of turning words into my own stories, therefore I will burst eventually. Literally and psychologically.

2. Not knowing LONELINESS has taken me into a whirlwind race with silence. Silence always wins, of course. Therefore I can't take it with me in this almost-fake running with schedules or people or things to do. Therefore, I'll burst.

3. I have not read a book in three weeks now. Therefore , I'll burst with an empty brain.

4. I acknowledge the fact that I need help. Therefore, I will not burst.